Rediscovered this great site with weekly poetry prompts. This week:”leave a first line and borrow a first line”.
This is funny, Dave commented on an earlier post and said he was using my first line. This morning, I decided to tackle the prompt (last minute). Randomly chose a first line and whose did I choose? Yep, Dave. So thank you.
Then Gautami’s first line grabbed me as well.
So a haiku and a pantuom:
through rough patchwork fields
two lizards crawled their way home
hawk spied minute dots
Thank you, Dave
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
that word you lost I found it under a rock
“solace” sketched in the sand, hidden from view
you dropped the word on the way to the tavern
sat on a lone bar stool and searched for it
“solace” sketched in the sand, hidden from view
other words dropped on your journey as you
sat on a lone bar stool and searched for it
“peace”, “forgiveness”, “serenity”; still lost
other words dropped on your journey as
the bottle filled the crevices of your loneliness
“peace”, “forgiveness” “serenity”; still lost
I cannot carry the word back home
the bottle filled the crevices of your loneliness
music filled your head in the cavernous darkness
I cannot carry the word back home
you know where to look
music filled your head in the cavernous darkness
you dropped the word on the way to the tavern
you know where to look
that word you lost I found it under a rock
Thank you, Gautami
Visit Read, Write, Poem. Lots of poems, lots of prompts. Are you participating in NaWriPOMO? I am. Would you like a poem postcard by a student from my school? It is my second annual poetry project for the school. Contact me.
6 responses so far ↓
throwshiswords // March 26, 2009 at 2:47 pm |
I’m so pleased you found inspiration in my poem’s first line. I love your haiku, the way each line changes your point of view – first zooming in close then swooping all the way out and up to the hawk. Isn’t it amazing how much action can be compressed into three little lines?
Your pantuom is amazing. I could see this actually happening – someone writing a word in the sand and covering it with a rock. That’s a great image in itself, but then I love how you take it further, and the sadness and yet still with hope is beautiful!
gautami tripathy // March 27, 2009 at 12:32 pm |
Both are awesome. The haiku is o the point and the pantoum is so full of imagery!
Thanks for using my line. You did really great work with it!
over the ridge and hard planes
Poetry Friday: New Book | Check It Out // March 27, 2009 at 12:38 pm |
[...] Record by Julie Larios. It is her first time to host. I have an original haiku and pantuom at Deowriter this week as [...]
Mary Lee // March 28, 2009 at 10:09 am |
“Borrow a first line” might be fun to do with kids!
wayne // March 29, 2009 at 1:12 am |
nicely done
Nicole Nicholson // April 1, 2009 at 3:36 pm |
Wow. Agreed with Gautami. Both are awesome – and I especially loved what you did with her first line in the pantoum. I have to give props to anyone who can write a good pantoum, and you’ve done it.